I was always "Super Mom." My house was always perfect and my girls and I were always perfectly dressed. I was
involved in everything from PTA to sports for my girls, and did a perfect job. I was sooo busy, I never stopped to smell the
roses!!! I always had to do everything myself and everything had to be perfect.
When I was a single parent, I was very busy. Being a "Super Mom" was even harder, but I did it. After two years
of being single, I met this wonderful man named Bill Radcliffe. Now I had a second chance to be happy again. How lucky I was.
We got married. On our honeymoon, we went on a cruise, came back, and we were so happy.
Three days later, all of a sudden everything came to a screeching halt. I was in a car accident only one block
away from where we lived, and our lives began to crumble. Bill saw me in crucifying pain, and on some occasions, he would
have to roll me out of bed, bathe me and comb my hair. I told Bill that I would understand if he left me, but instead he said
"this is an opportunity to show you how much I love you. "We were in this together. What a wonderful man I married.
Through chiropractic care, I would improve, but would then have relapses and be at square one again. Despite
my injury. I was a survivor and would not give up. I had just started my paralegal business, which was a dream of mine. I
would lay in bed with my telephone and calendar next to me and schedule appointments. Sometimes, because I was in too much
pain, I would make appointments in the evening so Bill could meet with my clients. Since I was unable to type, due to my injury,
I would go through the divorce papers in pen and Bill would then drop them off at a typist.
I remember one time I asked God, why is this happening to me I now know this was a jolt He gave me so I would
have a personal relationship with God. He wanted me closer to Him and to slow down and look at all the beautiful things He
created. Did you ever look at a tree and see how beautiful the leaves are, and how massive the trunk of the tree is? I knew
that I could not be a "Super Mom" any longer, I had to learn to slow down.
After our son Andrew grew to 20 pounds, we had to hire someone to help me because my neck would go out if I
carried him. I remember how it hurt so much when I saw other moms carry their child and I could not. How lucky you moms out
there are that can take care of your own babies. Count your blessings. This is all behind me now, but when I write this it
still hurts and I cry.
The accident happened 11 years ago, and Bill took care of me for eight years. About three years ago. I began
to stabilize but was extremely limited and could do virtually nothing of a physical nature. However, almost a year ago. I
began taking in herbal tea that apparently has an anti-inflammatory effect and as a result, I can do much more now. I am still
quite disabled compared to what other people can do (i.e. I am very limited in my ability to drive, type, and life) and I
still have pain, but at least I can essentially functions on a day to day basis, and I am grateful that the accident did not
leave me in a wheelchair.
Bill and I changed our lives, two years ago by going to a holistic doctor who taught us how to meditate each
day, surround ourselves with candles, fresh flowers, plants, and waterfalls. Yes, we have a fountain inside our home-the water
is so tranquil. Also, he taught us how to eat right, so we lost our excess weight.
What I learned in these 11 years: I don't take life for granted, because it can be taken away from you: 2) always
be happy with what you have count your blessings, and 3) the best gift I got was that now, I have a personal relationship
with God.
Bonnie Radcliffe is a freelance writes and a paralegal with her husband's law practice in Chino Hills.